If the relationship is healthy, we shall feel more alive when we are together and more motivated to live to our full potential. The other person’s love should set us free to be the person we were created to be. Marriage (contrary to many people’s perception) can be liberating. The experience of a strong marriage is of living a life that is renewed by another’s love.

Our closest friends or family are often the people who recognise most accurately the effect of the relationship on us. If we bring out the best in one another, other people want to be around us. Does being together make each of us more rather than less of a person?
This second test reveals whether our love motivates and inspires us. For some couples the sheer effort involved in keeping the relationship going drains them and causes them to feel trapped. That is not a healthy basis for marriage. They may have been going out with their partner for some time and are afraid of hurting them by breaking off the relationship. But it is better to break up sooner rather than later if the relationship has no long term future.

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